its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
Dude you have to stop using "I eat good pussy" as a pick up line
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
Punched myself in the face trying to open a bottle of Vicodin one handed. Night is going well.
Randomize
