I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
dude, i have to cancel tonight, my neighbor just bought a goat
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
Apparently she was filling Miller Lite bottles with water because I refused to be seen drinking water in a bar
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
I might have been the first person in 2015 to throw up on a yellow cab before climbing in it.
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize