It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
No subtext here. People are naked.
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
