she takes plan B like it's going out of style
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
is it fun? or sober?
Randomize
