and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
I knew my sister shouldn't have gone to the bacherlotte party. Two of the other brides maids have black eyes and my fiancé called me and asked if this is the crazy she's marrying
Woke up this morning with girl, I ask her for some gum. She says "there's a guest toothbrush for the boys in my bathroom". I can't decide whats worse, that she has a shack brush or that I actually used it
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
there's a bowling ball in the dishwasher and a dog bone in the freezer
Randomize
