What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
I saw a seagull swallow a hot-dog whole today, it reminded me of you.
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
Tabs I had open this morning: "15 hedgehogs with things that look like hedgehogs" and an unexplored google search for "how do I express my love of tacos"
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
You spilt a drink on my couch, then used my dog to mop it up... you called her a mop dog, repeatedly
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
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