That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
Don't upload the drink o meter to your google calendar. Somehow binge drinking looks even worse with a time stamp.
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
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