Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
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