I'm trashed wearing your mom's snuggie. She says hello.
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
I seriously need 2 stop fake jacking off in peoples faces at work...the I.T. Guy just showed me the security surveillance tapes.
phone sex would be way better if there was an app for that...
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
Randomize
