he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
I was barred out and drunk as fuck locked out at 3am in my Indian costume. It was literally freezing outside. I laid down on the concrete and made a bonfire with dry leaves. Then proceeded to ask.the.bonfire nicely to "please dont go out". Drunk me went strait up survival mode.
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
Nope. Im a prince of the americas. I treat my women like future queens. Also, im drunk watching the royal wedding
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
Randomize
