this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
I told her for every minute she spent down there, I would donate a dollar to the Haiti relief fund... totally worked
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
she woke me up with a blowjob, mickey mouse pancakes, a mugshot of my ex in county jail, and tequilla. Do you know if she fucked someone behind my back or did i win the vagina lottery?
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
Look, if a guy shows up at your house. He's short, name is Logan, has weird vertical hair, let him in, give him food, and a place to stay. He's on a ver important mission. And I am he. as he is me and we are all together. And we are the eggman, goo goo gajoob.
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
Randomize
