we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
drunk me cartwheeled over a turtle sandbox & slit my foot open on a cinder block. how do you explain that to a doctor?
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