I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
I crawled out his bedroom window, forgetting he lives in a split level and there is a 10 foot drop back there. I had to text him to come help me I twisted my ankle.
I just made kick ass drunk stir fry while taking care of three other drunk people and doing shots. I don't understand how that's not wife material
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
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