How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
Naked Twister starts at high noon
This wedding is gonna be a disaster. I already had to turn down one of the groomsmen who offered me $100 to sleep with him next wknd.
Too low?
Yes.
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
The guy I brought home last night made a speedy escape while I was in the bathroom. The only trace I found of his flight was a lone sock on the stairs.... It was like a whorey low budget Cinderella
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
My sister's exploding appendix just cock blocked me...
Randomize
