i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
he texted me at 1 in the morning to ask if i wanted to come over and play in the snow with him
at least he gets points for a creative booty call
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment.
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
My boobs look fucktastic, I have a booty call on Sunday and a dick photo on my phone. Life is grand!
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
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