if i can run in heels then i can drive
i just saw my boxers from 2 days ago stuck in a tree 4 miles from my house
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
If I don't wake up tomorrow you inherit my paycheck and can only spend it at cinnabon
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
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