batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
You know you need to hit the gym when you're not strong enough to get the cork outta the wine bottle. And you know you're a drunk when that's the only motivation to do exercises
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
If y'all wanna know how far the apple fell from the tree I'm sexting during Easter service. Mom would be so proud 😳
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
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