Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
I keep forgetting that I only have two nostrils.
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
Maybe it's because I walked straight up to that shelf of vodka with a look of determination that said "I mean business".
I usually have to have a cart! If that doesn't say "I mean business" then I don't know what does
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
I know you won't see this for awhile, but I had to tell somebody, and you're like the only person who won't judge me for having an accidental erotic encounter with General Tso's chicken.
Randomize
