terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
I'm laying here half naked telling him I'm eating gold fish to change the subject of hookin up cuz I don't wanna put pants on
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
I was just informed that I asked for a glass of wine at the police station
I'm sure it would have gone very well with the cigarette you lit there.
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
Randomize
