He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
so they are in my phone as twin 1 and twin 2. but i forget which is which. did i put them in order of who I hooked up with first, or who is sexier? cause i'm not trying to text the one with the girlfriend
1st off, theyre identical. 2ndly, have i ever told you that youre a huge slut? hope that helps
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
Your shirt... Was in my pants
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
Randomize
