No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
The roommate asked me to make sure no one fucked in his room. And then preceded to give only me permission to fuck in his room. Had no idea who I was, just thought I was trustworthy cause I had Edward 40 hands. Felt like a Tarantino movie.
You need Xanax blowdarts
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
My mom has had 5 shots of fireball today and she's still functioning normally... She's just extra polite.
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
Randomize
