Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
Visiting my great uncle went well. The highlight of the evening was when he said, "Oh my god. I'm 79 and I'm teaching 18 year old kids how to roll a joint."
Randomize