i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
Woke up and there was a kayak in the pool. Are you alive?
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
Randomize
