So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
He left me a five minute voicemail apologizing for chasing me with a meat beater. I'm actually not sure what that means.
If she asks the cat was vomiting before I fed it fried calamari
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
Bro i just made a pipe out of a mechanical pencil and the top to an eye drop bottle. Does that make me some kind of pot god?
Randomize
