Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma.
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
Randomize
