I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
In the ER. 2nd degree burns. Drunken attempt to make gasoline scented candles.
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
I know it basically makes me the worst feminist ever, but I don't want to kill my own spiders. And I will pay my personal spider hit man with sammiches and unlimited , uninhibited access to my vagina.
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
So. Um. Hypothetically speaking...how would one get a squirrel out of the house?
Randomize
