why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
Change the recording on your voicemail. He found your number and my ass print on the car hood.
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
He just got back from doing field research studying wild chimpanzees in the goddamn jungle. Obviously I fucked him.
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
i just remembered i drunk watched the brave little toaster last night
Randomize
