best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
Life Lesson #1 of 2013: double-fisting shower beers and shaving my bikini line should be reserved for two different showers.
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
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