Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
my voice of reason is faarrr too drunk for me to listen.
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
my hand froze to the top of can of beer cuz i fell asleep outside. i decided to find a way to open the bottom of the can before addressing my severe frostbite. PRIORITIES!
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
I wrote "fuck you meg" on my toaster strudel with the icing. I call it "passive aggressive breakfast"
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
Randomize
