I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
I have family pictures in an hour and a half and I'm 9 beers deep. This is how I get written out of my grandparents will...
He taped a champagne bottle to both his hands and called himself edward champagne hands. At one point he poured some on his lap and said " Just needed to make sure my dick got some too"
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
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