that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
im having a threesome with these popsicles
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
it glows. i had to have it.
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
I woke up hugging my purse and I found a business card in my underwear. How?
is that a dick in a sweater?
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
Slept with a member of the band last night, found out today after extensive stalking he’s engaged. Pro tip: don’t research one night stands.
Randomize
