nut hugger
I murdered the dance floor call the cops
are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
I was just shot with a dart gun by one of my coworkers while walking to the printer. Ironically I was printing my resignation letter...
O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
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