Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
Played "Which Couple Will Take Me Home Tonight" at the bar last night... I can now cross three-some off my bucket list
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
Just had that moment when you realize the two drunk women shoving all their money down your clothes were your middle school teachers...
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
So last night, I bought mother's day cards and the Plan B pill.
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
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