I took my penis out way before I got to the bathroom and some dude kicked me out.
Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
Watching crazy stupid love and drinking alone isn't what I thought it was gonna be
Its TONS better. Expect a drunk dial at 11:54
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
Randomize
