So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
Can't be like "hey can you elaborate on this three year old tweet" can I?
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
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