p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
My phone has started autocorrecting "monogamy" to "monogamish"
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
I’M DRUNK AND EXCITED.
Randomize
