I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
Had to use Google translator to be able to tell the cleaning lady not to throw away the condoms we have strategically placed throughout the house.
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
and after i failed the breathalyzer i said to the cop "i've never been very good at tests"....
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
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