So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
Your my favorite hello and hardest goodbye.
And I especially mean that last part, half the time you pass out somewhere and it is impossible to get you to leave.
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
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