bras are like tupperware for tits, keeps em fresh.
Turns out you can't chew it over with twix in real life
Dude I've never seen anyone get slapped that hard
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
I party with great urgency now.
Randomize
