East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
Oh wait looks like my cousin is getting deported THERE'S HOPE FOR THIS CHRISTMAS YET
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
I've lost all respect for marriage since I joined this bachelor party.
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
I woke up with my phone plugged into an extension cord in my garage. No clue how I got home. Videos of me flogging my roommate with my set of keys telling him he's the worst roommate ever. And my mom woke me up at 8am asking how to make a DVD...Goddamnit first Friday.
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
soo... how was my night?
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
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