So I have exactly 420 dollars saved up in tips from the past week. I win, and I take that as a sign from god that I am allowed to use that money to buy drugs.
Somehow me showing up to/breaking into her house only to find I was a week early for the party became a night of weed cookies and sex.
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
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