I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
I'm sitting on the patient chair, waiting for my vagina to be violated & "i don't want to miss a thing" has been playing on repeat. WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME.
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
I'm pretty sure I just crapped out my pancreas. I have 2 of those, right?
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
I pay 3K a month for rent, yet last nite I broke into the back of my building, scaled over 2 tons of garbage in heels and took a dirty freight elevator to my floor just so my doorman wouldn't see how fucked up I was
U know ur prob on camera right?
One a scale of one to hella drunk, how gracefully can I make it down those stairs
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
Randomize
