i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
Walked home this morning with my contacts in a shot glass.
First class.
you came in and threw goldfish on our blue carpet and screamed SWIM BITCHES and then made me drink a best friends potion with you
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
The maintenance guy asked for a box to stand on to reach the ceiling. All I could offer him was a keg.
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
I think I just sharted jello shots
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
Randomize
