Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
When She took off her bra.... A tube of lipgloss, her phone, I.D. And a wad of twenties fell out.... I'm officially no longer a butt man
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
I gave the bathroom attendant $5 last night for turning the sink on for me. What. The. Fuck.
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
Oh Jesus. Are you going to the hospital?
No I'm showering then leaving for Vegas
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
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