he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
Randomize
