then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
I'm alittle affraid you might be dead, seeing how your work party is in an hour and you haven't answered me? I mean I'm picturing you 1. Passed out in your car covered in fries or 2. On a boat in a box to Mexico covered in coke. Please let it be number 1. And aren't we going to your work party?
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
No one wants to start their day off with bloody lemons and a tampon in the toilet. Wtf.
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
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