Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
who are you and why are you in my phone as dr. seuss
I'm trying real hard to keep it on the DL how drunk I am at lunch with my grandma.
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
Randomize
