Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
Also, just had a student offer to sell me Xanax. Want some? Just for like a rainy day. Or our memorial day shitshow. Or just another Wednesday night.
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
Randomize
