You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
I told him to come back in 5mins cause i needed to take a few more shots before i could talk to him
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
i just heard Winston Churchill in auto-tune. thank you nerds.
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class
why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.
I didn't even have time to sit down and the nurse was like: ''You've been having unprotected sex.'' HOW DOES SHE KNOW?!?
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
I'm such a good drunk match marker. You single, you single... Drunk friend meet single boy. BOOM illegitimate baby made!
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
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