More tranny stories later!
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
Never eat 3 McGriddles and drink a carton of milk. It's like you're successfully killing self but you're alive.
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
An accidental pregnancy to a guy with a trustfund is no mistake. It is a gift from god.
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
Her car is covered in frozen vomit, and she lost her iPhone. I'm also pretty sure I smoked crack last night. Rest in peace 2014.
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
Randomize
