Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
You were running around the house covered in syrup, with shredded down pillow feathers on your body screaming "AFLACK!" at everyone
Why is there a living, breathing cow on your front porch?
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
he tried to breastfeed my turtle
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Remembering I sold my brand new Blackberry to a stranger for a few pints = Worst night of my life. Now to work out what I did with my shoes.
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
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