Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
just met our mailman at a party, he asked me out. i said yes, but only if he picks me up in the mail truck. how jealous are you
saw a man at the beach in a red speedo. when he rolled over he unintentionally displayed a HUGE skid mark.
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
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