Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
I give all credit to my lucky thong, there's never a time I haven't gotten laid while wearing it
Dude you were so wasted you thought a fake electric candle was real and tried to light your cig with it. Multiple times.
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
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